Hog Report®

Oink, oink, snort… here comes the Hog Report® for week 13.

Hog of the Week – Yeah sure, those Widowmakers made big headlines with the trade of all trades during week 7 - which oddly helped rescue DT from "entirel luck"... whatever that is.  But check out those Puck Fackers.  They are still dominating, even without Priest Holmes.  This "RETURNING CHAMPION" has scored 1,233 points over 13 weeks so far this year... that's an average of 95 points per week!  And they’ve done it without any major trades.  The bench scored 12 points this week.  But the bench has produced when called upon.  Priest Holmes goes down – Derrick Blaylock to the rescue.  Plexico Burress goes down – Brandon Stockley to the rescue.  This week Will Nott’s team produced 1,019 passing/receiving/rushing yards, 11 TD’s, 2 XP’s, 1 FG, FUMBLE recovered, and 3 SACKS…. for a whopping 141 points!  The third highest point total in SFFL history! Matt Spencer scored 156 in week 10 of this year, David Taylor scored 143 during week 7 of 2002, and Butch Eads scored 140 during week 4 of 2003.  Time to bestow to Will the Hog of the Week honor.  Congrats to Will!

HOTW Past winners…

Week 1 – Puck Fackers, Buffalo Soldiers

Week 2 – P-Cubed, Rough Riders

Week 3 – Bear Necessities

Week 4 – D-Teasers

Week 5 – C4 Explosives, Rough Riders

Week 6 – C4 Explosives

Week 7 – D-Teasers

Week 8 – Widowmakers

Week 9 – Pigskins

Week 10 – Buffalo Soldiers

Week 11 – Flea Flickers

Week 12 – Widowmakers

Week 13 – Puck Fackers

Game Summaries:  Puck Fackers walloped the Blackcats 141-90 behind step up performances by Blaylock and Stockley, of course Donovan McNabb… D-Teasers used their entirel luck to hang on and defeat the Pigskins’ 108-88… Widowmakers snuck past division rival, and losers of 3 straight, Buffalo Soldiers 91-85… C4 Explosives slipped, I mean slipped past the Flea Flickers 100-99 behind 4 XP’s and a FG on MNF… P-Cubed blasted the Bear Necessities’ starters (Favre 1 pt, Green 1 pt, Moss 1 pt, Clayton 1 pt, Brown 1 pt, and Franks 0 pts) 88-23, but lost to Bear Necessities bench 88-92… Rough Riders beat the Southsiders a.k.a. Hennings’ keepers 78-60.

Playoff Analysis:  The playoffs should be interesting.... featuring the likes of the Returning Champion Puck Fackers, Widowmakers Evil Empire, D-Teasers and their Entirel Luck, and probably... Wildcard Buffalo Soldiers. 

Points in the Pen: 

Aided by highly sophisticated gadgetry (calculators) and state-of-the-art statistical notation (paper and pencil), this publication has compiled mind-numbing estimatics that backwardly projects optimal scores based on optimal lineups.

Optimal Wins – games you would have won with the optimal lineup in…

Week 1 – Blackcats, Flea Flickers, C4 Explosives

Week 2 – Roughriders, Pigskins(TIE)

Week 3 – Southsiders

Week 4 – None

Week 5 – P-Cubed

Week 6 – P-Cubed, Flea Flickers, Buffalo Soldiers (TIE)

Week 7 – None

Week 8 – None

Week 9 – P-Cubed

Week 10 – P-Cubed

Week 11 – Roughriders, Pigskins, Buffalo Soldiers

Week 12 – Roughriders, Buffalo Soldiers

Week 13 – Pigskins, Buffalo Soldiers, Bear Necessities

And finally, a look at the wildcard standings...

Where’s Widow? 

Right here stupid.